Tyrant In Training Episode 39 Patrick Guera is Kevin Ryan’s accomplice

[00:00:04] Okay, hello everyone. This is the Tyrant In Training podcast. I am the host Kevin Ryan I Usually have helped with these intros in the form of my fiancee Celine, but she has left me so I'm all alone now

[00:00:18] She oh sorry. She is just gonna poem for a few days. That's what she told me So I'm gonna choose to believe that and when I have finished recording this and ready to be released

[00:00:28] I'm gonna sit at the front door and wait for her so wish me luck on that I'm gonna kind of just dive into this this episode, but I should explain

[00:00:37] Usually how this podcast is done is I will help a guest each week as they become the tyrant of their own country I want to do something a little bit different

[00:00:46] So I've actually got a friend of mine on to help me instead instead of me becoming a tyrant or ruling my own country I would like to become a serial killer and I say that fictionally and factually my reasons Of course are naturally like everyone's reasons

[00:01:01] I will probably going to become a failed screenwriter and I will be out for revenge So I want a backup plan now the friend I have on is Patrick Guerra who is a director and filmmaker and a co-host of the horror podcast

[00:01:16] Rewind of the Living Dead which is for horror fanatics as him and his co-host discuss The newest horror movies the best horror movies stuff like that

[00:01:24] So I think he's be really good to help me like how do I become the next Michael Myers or John Kramer or pinhead or anything else? Now I will dive into this but before I actually do that I should say that if you want to follow Patrick

[00:01:37] You will find him at director Patrick on threads and Instagram and Twitter I still believe and also just look up rewind rewind of the Living Dead podcast if you want to check him out and As far as this tyrant in training podcast

[00:01:50] You can find me on any social media Twitter blue sky Instagram treads Facebook at Kevin Ryan Kev Ryan person so at Kev Ryan person and Tyrant in training podcast you'd find wherever you look for a podcast just stick to the same one

[00:02:07] You just found this on that's probably the easiest one. Yeah, so I'm gonna dive into this brilliantly It's not all fun games about figuring out what your horror icon name would be or what mask you'd wear

[00:02:17] That's what a lot of admin didn't realize so thanks Patrick for for walking me through the budgetary needs of a serial killer Okay, bye everyone

[00:02:27] Out of the two of us. Yeah, I know you a little bit. You know me a little bit. Yeah, I think I know you well enough Who do you think honestly would be more likely to turn into like a deranged serial killer a deranged serial killer now?

[00:02:46] Okay, yeah, yeah, no, I like that. No, let's go. Let's go all the way I think people you know, I've been I've actually been compared To Charles Manson like features wise. Yeah. Yeah, some guy was like well you look like Charles Manson I go okay fair enough

[00:03:00] So I think just on site alone people will go that's the guy but I go yeah But look at the history of deranged serial killers You're not gonna define Charles Manson now. Yeah, cuz I'm not okay

[00:03:11] Not not not at all when you start but I but I would but I would push back if somebody goes well He's definitely the serial killer. I mean just look at him, right? And then I go yeah, but let's look at the history of serial

[00:03:22] They sort of look like my man kev here Like they look closer to Kev's look than they do my look if I shaved a beard I could be mistaken for the zodiac error. Perhaps a little bit. So yeah, yeah I mean not the end by the way

[00:03:39] There are some like Charles Manson's one the guy in Japan who had the cult he looked just like me too Like I mean it's almost like serial killers either look like you or they look like me. It's like there's no in between

[00:03:51] No in between there's no there's no spectrum It's either they look like kev your friendly neighbor or they look like Patrick the deranged psychopath who walks down the street and And is in his shouting at birds. You also look like Dave Grohl. So you could go either way

[00:04:05] I've gotten that before I was in a bar in Florida no less I was in a bar and the bartender insisted that I was Dave Grohl

[00:04:12] He goes holy shit man you're Dave Grohl and I was like I'm not and and he goes and then he kind of got made Like whatever dude. I love your music and I was like cool. I'm not Dave Grohl

[00:04:22] Did you get a free drink out of that? He did give me a free drink Yeah, but then he got kind of pissed he got kind of pissed him because I wouldn't admit I was Dave Grohl. I don't know

[00:04:29] See I definitely would be just like winking at him and then writing my like giving him my signature and being like Don't tell anyone I see that's why I like you kev because

[00:04:40] When you bounce on it when I bounce an idea off you I go. Yeah, that's way better It's way funnier if I would have just been like just just thanks for the free drink Dave love Dave

[00:04:49] Or if you know that's probably illegal cuz I was like if you got out like a five euro or five dollar note And just littered on fire. Just so yeah, right? Yeah, yeah He'll think yeah. Oh my god. He's made of money

[00:05:01] What a rock star man. That was a rock star just came in there I just Just burnt a dollar bill what we could do is

[00:05:12] We could we could make a persona for one of us and then at the end of it kind of like a broad prediction either angle Where both of us will do it? Because I'll be honest. I had one or two bad writing them

[00:05:23] So I'm ready to just chuck that in and go straight into like jigsaw or something But yeah, since both of us look equally deranged serial killer apparently No spectrum. I should also say we're just serious killers because the deranged part like they don't think they're

[00:05:41] Generally, yeah, they would know no, I mean any any great villain in a film doesn't think they're the enemy at all Do they what was Freddy Krueger's motive?

[00:05:50] What was he actually oh god his he's my he's my least favorite of the slasher's because he was a child murderer Oh, that was this thing. Yeah, and the parents got revenge on him by burning him alive

[00:06:01] And then he came back as this dream demon and I go why the hell would anybody root for this guy? This is me at like eight years old going. Why would anyone have a Freddy Krueger lunchbox? He hates us But that's like he genuinely hates in jokes, right?

[00:06:15] He was a witty. Oh, he was jokey. Yeah around around part three He got very he got very jokey, and it was not that fun the scariest version of Freddy Krueger's in part two for sure

[00:06:24] Right, right. Did I ever tell you that when he you know the remake good for years ago? It was weird. I do know the remake unfortunately the fellow who is Rorschach, right in Watchman. Oh, yeah Yeah, yeah, Jackie Earl Haley played a played a Freddy Krueger

[00:06:41] Yeah, just just not not the best movie unfortunately. Do you know? I know how well you remember it But I went into the cinema and I'm not a horror man at all

[00:06:51] But I went into the cinema friend of mine. We sat in like the first or second row So sitting on my popcorn fine, and you know what the start to the movie Kind of like a classic way to start the horror movies where you have something scary happen

[00:07:03] And then you can get into war building and everything. Yep. The cold open. Yeah, I guess it's just the Like final girl or maybe someone else but um She's in a diner, and we don't know yet

[00:07:13] It's a dream sequence and there's a couple of jump scares right just to get you so that happened two or three times And I do get very jumpy. That's why I don't like horror movies I'm just not don't enjoy this but

[00:07:25] Movies together now chance. I'm so stubborn and I'm an adult. I'm a grown man if I want to be scared baby The first two or three jump scares I was fine

[00:07:34] I had no issue everyone else I could hear jumping and I was sitting there eating my popcorn gone I'm brilliant. I'm an adult right and Then the final one where she thinks she's going to die

[00:07:44] It's a jump scare and she wakes up and she's in the diner again, but it's now real life It's a lot of people around everything and she's waiting for someone and the camera Nobody will remember this shot because it's not an important shot in the scene

[00:07:56] But I wait her a waiter comes over and says to her do you want coffee? And she said no no I'm just waiting for a friend and then the camera cuts to the next shot

[00:08:03] Which is a close-up of the door as it opens because our friend is coming in right but the door has a bell in it You know the ones that when you open it it just oh, yes So when classic classic shot in a movie

[00:08:15] Dingo and then he comes in so when the waiter goes oh do you want some coffee? And she's like no no I'll just wait and then immediately cuts to a ding and the door opening all the popcorn was out on the floor

[00:08:26] Like that was the biggest jump I've ever had The bell fucks me over and for the next hour and a half. I did not enjoy that movie I paid about 10 euro They had a scary And everybody in the theater is like oh look at Bellboy up front

[00:08:50] That's great So I was thinking yeah, I think I need to chuck in the whole writing stuff It's not working my god that roots see how that because they're they're all very famous Like every horror movie has a very famous

[00:09:04] Like pinhead I have no idea what that movies about bring no the guy right? Oh, yeah icon. I've met him He's a nice guy. Oh really from the Hellraiser series is that still going it's still going they just had a remake that was okay

[00:09:17] It was not the best remake But it I've seen far the nightmare and I'm sure you make far worse like I think I could do something like that go that route right this podcast forget about that and

[00:09:29] But like pinhead is just his name in it is that are they kind of eventually give him that name? Yeah, I think he just he adopted the name. I don't think I don't think pinhead has a name necessarily I could be wrong

[00:09:41] I get stuff been horror wrong all the time and and don't you know what Kev? There's people on YouTube who will make sure and remind me when I get something wrong They're the best sort of people. Oh, they're so good nothing like a good YouTube comment

[00:09:54] But I don't think I could go and again, we'll just I'll go for now I'm just thinking of if I'm going to pursue this but you can take up the mantle if you want during the remake there

[00:10:02] But if I'm gonna go this route, I can't get you can't be terrified by the legend of Kevin Ryan The Kevin Ryan isn't the name that Wait, do you have a do you have a good middle name? Do you have a long middle name? Anthony Kevin Anthony Ryan

[00:10:19] That's a serial. That's a proper serial killer name Yeah, but is it not like so Wait, it's Freddy Krueger. It's actual name. Yes, isn't it the guy was Fred Krueger in real life All right, Kevin Anthony Ryan is very common though in Ireland. Well

[00:10:34] You don't have that like there's not a Fred Krueger in that universe who's like people keep tweeting me Yeah, there's not a guy there's not a guy going I'm not the dream demon, please There's not he's not out there Krueger Krueger Krueger's probably pretty popular in Germany

[00:10:49] Yeah, you see yeah, you're not gonna guess and Fred would work in Germany as well. So yeah That's why I don't think you think Ryan works in that scenario. I think it's fine. Yeah

[00:10:59] I mean, I could go with the Irish version which is Quivy Noreen, but that doesn't sound menacing at all Quivy Noreen sounds like a like skincare Skin disease No, I mean for your blotches. It does. Yeah Yeah, do I take that?

[00:11:15] We Quivy Noreen sounds nothing like anything's remotely scary But you know what actually if you go with Quivy Noreen, I don't think that's a good name like that's not a Name that's not a name. You want to call someone right?

[00:11:30] Detain with I don't think so the thing with the with horror villains and any like any villain to be fair Like Darth Vader is a villain But everyone is like who do you want to dress up as a Halloween Darth Vader is cool

[00:11:40] Right, oh yeah, very popular, right? My son was Michael Myers this last year. Yeah, he needs to come down But I think if I'm going to be a horror villain or at least a legend of one There I'm gonna make myself

[00:12:01] It can't be someone who then in two years time people are like all it's he should be a good guy He should be an anti-hero so I think we've been our rain

[00:12:08] Quivy Noreen our people are already upset just at the name alone. Yeah, nobody's gonna let me dress up as Quivy Noreen Oh, I would disagree I go to Comic-Con every year. I'm lucky enough to work at Comic-Con every year there somebody will be Quivy Noreen

[00:12:24] If the movie comes out in June Comic-Cons in July and somebody's Quivy Noreen for sure. All right I think I think it's not any it's not anyone you want to hang out with but they're gonna do it That is so true in so many ways

[00:12:38] When sharknado came out there was a it came out the week of Comic-Con It came out like the Monday before comic-con or the Friday before comic-con the on preview night There was someone in the sharknado costume. It was literally they were in a tornado of sharks

[00:12:52] Four days after it was released that it wasn't just like the director was No, it was Believe me. He was there too. I'm sure yeah But I think like what happens in wrestling right is you will have you'll have a villain in wrestling, right?

[00:13:07] So whoever and they will so like the Undertaker, right? Oh, yeah My favorite come out. He will he'll be a bad guy But eventually what happens is even though he's doing bad things people go He's so cool. I'm just gonna start cheering him

[00:13:19] And it becomes really hard because then you're like well, you're meant to be a bad guy But now people are cheering you so guess you'd have to be a good guy now, but all you want to go to root of

[00:13:27] No, no, I don't want them going with me I'm going to Quivi Noreen is definitely the way to go because who's who's the who's the longest lasting heel in all of wrestling?

[00:13:35] Doink the clown nobody likes doing no like they boo him every time he comes out and doink and Quivi Noreen are the same language Okay, I wait okay, maybe I can get features off dying to count without going just down because then I'm just a bad Joker impression

[00:13:53] There's plenty of those yeah, I think that's being done So if I go a Quivi Noreen right now the other thing is do you know the way you have them? Do you know what jigsaw and saw what that guy's name is John or something is it? It's

[00:14:05] The guy. Oh god See I'm gonna get in trouble for not knowing this right off the top of my head And I just spent a lot of time talking about him

[00:14:13] But I'm gonna have I know that the the little doll is not called jigsaw. Oh the dogs the doll itself Is like called Billy or something like that where did you talk him from then John Kramer is the name of the jigsaw killer

[00:14:26] He was in Frasier as well, honey. I think so yeah, he's fantastic Yes, he done anything besides so or did he quickly go wait a minute? I can get a franchise artist He just he just had a romantic movie with Sigourney Weaver

[00:14:38] He played Sigourney Weaver's love interest in some in some movie recently. That's pretty cool. Yeah, like he's a really good actor Actually, here's the craziest thing that there was just a saw X which is the 10th film in the salt franchise

[00:14:51] Yeah, X is never a good number in a franchise in horror. No, it was one of the best of the entire franchise really That was easily one of the best There was there was spiral which left a lot to be desired right okay, which was with Chris Rock

[00:15:05] Yeah, and it was not funny or fun And then there was saw X with with Tobin Bell back and it was really good I was like, huh, this is actually a really good. I've never had a 10th movie in a horror franchise be like, yeah

[00:15:18] That's the one you need to get back in If you really want to get into this series it saw 10 guys like no one will take you serious when you say that So if I go Kevin Ryan, but I'm known as Quivy and Irene right

[00:15:33] Well, you don't know Kevin Ryan ideally The people I'm terrorizing wouldn't know Kevin Ryan. They'd know Quivy and Irene, right? They'd be they'd be on the lookout for Quivy norine. Yeah, and then John Kramer

[00:15:45] He had a load of traps so I might get to traps a bit later I might get might get some traps gone because I think that'd be fun right instead of you

[00:15:52] You know, I'm not gonna walk around with a gun just shooting people. That's just lazy and just not By the way, this is a fictional podcast. This isn't actually happen Fantastic, yeah, you're setting limits on something that requires no limits whatsoever

[00:16:06] Speaking of limits because I think if I'm going to do if I'm gonna do this right I have to think of money, right? Okay, because we'd like Freddy Krueger doesn't have to worry about rain Trenton, right? No, Freddy Krueger's yeah, he's he's a ethereal. He doesn't yeah

[00:16:18] He's got it. He's already got a place in on the other side But like that boy look that boy. He's like a boiler room. He's got a cot That's where he used to kid that's where he used to

[00:16:30] Mean it's like oh like when you come into his world. It's that place It's where he last was on this on this mortal coil is now his inverse. Yeah Sort of like the upside down and straight straight things should quee v norine

[00:16:44] You know what quee v norine would have like in his alternate world it would be like Like wherever Jar Jar Binks is from Like that kind of like a terror Like the desert So I'm in the desert and

[00:16:59] Deserts aren't scary either like there's not a there's there's a couple of desert horror films But they're not as scary Would you not have an heart because I thought about this before when I was thinking of like oh

[00:17:08] I might write a horror that you know the way like one thing you could do is like very claustrophobic Atmosphere like aliens right very like love it. Yeah, one of my favorite

[00:17:16] But as I could you do the opposite then where it's very like not that this is a scene But you have a character who's in the middle of a desert where like

[00:17:23] Because you know any danger to come from anywhere. It's not like just a card or one exist one entrance Yeah, but I mean you have you have a tremors which was out in the desert and what a beloved film that is

[00:17:35] It's just fun. Yeah, so yeah, you could do it I I and I you had I had a lot of fun with tremors. I think that's a very fun movie Yeah, there is also the Hills Have Eyes which is terrifying Which is just like it's it's nasty

[00:17:50] So there certainly is place to it's not the scariest setting. It's what you do with the setting What I think I could do if I'm gonna go this route for Queen Beena Reem Because you know they all have especially they all have backstories as well

[00:18:03] So I think oh, yeah, I think what I could do and this kind of answers this this starts my problem of money and and Backstory out is that I'm just gonna chuck in the writing right? I did check that this idea

[00:18:17] I did check how much apparently on average a screenwriter makes right? So I'm gonna take this as the amount of money. I have Right to play with me if I'm gonna make traps I need to think about cost, right and

[00:18:32] If I go to LA and sit myself there then I can just go ask screen writers That can be my target because everyone has a group right right what is jigsaw? This is like people who did wrong or something no It's it's it's a

[00:18:48] At first it was people who need a reason to live And then it was like people who do other people wrong like it's it's it's woefully inconsistent

[00:18:57] Is there anything about I'd say writers, but is there anything in writing like a pet peeve of yours that you don't like? Oh god bolded slug lines right like I think that's Is that the bit that's the biggest thing that I feel like writers

[00:19:10] Right or Twitter argues about is whether you just slug that to bold that slug line or not Yeah, it seems to be the biggest argument on there or do I do I write in we see the killer?

[00:19:20] You know like oh people just go nuts if you break the fourth wall Those are two of your options. Do I go after people right? So I could go to LA and then Quivy nerying doesn't like people who bolder slug lines

[00:19:35] So goings friend you anyone who doesn't know a screenplay is basically if you are Setting up a scene that's in a hospital You'll say the interior of the hospital So we know we're inside the hospital and it's daytime yeah, and whether you bold that or not

[00:19:49] I tell us I tell a size and strike true That is the only way I strike through strike. He's good. I put strike through the entire script. I go This is my style. Okay. Yeah, I'm stylish writer

[00:20:00] That means it's optional whether you want to read it or not and and the banality of that argument by the way is perfect That that makes them the perfect target for a killer because that's like the rest of the world's like

[00:20:11] You give a shit of whether people bold that or not. They're not too concerned about them as victims Yeah, so then yeah, you've got a route for some people to die. So that's the perfect group

[00:20:21] We were just like there you they're arguing incessantly online whether they should bold something or not Yeah, okay. So I could go for them and then I'm gonna just say that I you know and last year of writing

[00:20:31] It's gone well, but it's I'm not gonna get paid next year. Apparently writers make 69 and a half thousand dollars a year That's okay figures. I didn't look too much into it. But yeah, that sounds about right now

[00:20:43] I want to live in LA and yeah, so you're living below the poverty line at 69 and a half thousand Okay, I think I can find a place to live Cuz again, I can't just be wandering the street. I'm not I'm not built for that

[00:20:58] I think I found a place that was like 600 a month. It's lovely You like it? It's all right. I'll show you this one. I'll say this any one of the killers in any of these movies

[00:21:08] They rarely have a place to live. Oh, but I'm just renting. I'm not I'm not I don't have that money 600 a month. Yeah, like I know what the hell type of coach is that that is a weird-looking couch

[00:21:22] Otters people that oh wait, is this just a room? No, this can't no. I think it's the whole building Why is there bunk beds? There's a lot of bunk beds in this. There's a lot

[00:21:30] This is getting is getting very culty. You may have stumbled Quivi Noreen has stumbled on to a cult Oh, that's a great twist. That's a great twist part of a cult

[00:21:40] The cult don't know that I'm off because I only drop in sleeping and off I go, you know Yeah, yeah, you just come in you do your business coming. Yeah You're the ideal roommate really and that's what they say on the news, you know, you know

[00:21:53] Months later when the police have finally caught you. He was the ideal roommate Oh, did my intense yoga and shouting for four hours and then left. Yeah Okay, so that'll only be about

[00:22:04] 7200 a year so now I've still got 60,000 left and I'm gonna knock off. I know Jesus how much for food? Another 7-2 for food. Yeah, we put in 7-2. I might get take as well, right

[00:22:15] That's 14 for so I'm down to 55,000. I'm gonna say okay, right. I'm not buying internet They live lean the killers live lean they have to be honest if they want to do this thing Do I need it and do I need to villains ever have a motor transport?

[00:22:31] You know in the original Halloween Michael Myers drove a station wagon and that was the least scary thing I've ever seen in a movie ever really Yeah, I'm gonna stop sharing that he drove a what he drove a station wagon like a

[00:22:45] Proper like wood paneled station wagon. I have to look this up. Oh god. Oh, you don't have station wagons in Ireland Oh, no, I know I know we don't really I don't yeah

[00:22:56] I mean, we don't have many more this it was it was a it was a mode of transportation at the time Okay, should I just go for a station wagon? I think so I doubt they'd be cheap

[00:23:06] I mean the car market in in California is insane. I did find one in Ireland off and it's oh Jesus oh wait. No, I have a 2008

[00:23:18] Great, I'm gonna show you there's be a lot of sharing screens here. This is good. Yeah, we might as well keep it open Yeah, I'll keep this open Volvo look at that a Volvo. It's reliable to reliable safe 7000 pounds. This is very nice actually

[00:23:34] I'm gonna check the boot is massive the boots massive and look it's got the cage in the back The cage got a cage in the back so that your your the people that you put there can't get over to you

[00:23:44] That's I mean you have to buy that. This is perfect I'm just gonna check is the NCT which is basically the roadwardness of it is that um, is that is that good because it's a Volvo

[00:23:54] It's a 2008 Volvo. It's gonna be fine. Yeah, the Irish government they'll catch on this if they don't NCT expires October 23. Oh, no, that's gone. That's so it's well past its expiration

[00:24:07] Perfect car. Okay. I'm gonna I'm gonna say I'm just gonna say a bit of work done to it And the cost of getting it retested will save 500 euro so seven and a half thousand done, right?

[00:24:18] We're down to like 47 and a half thousand and we have our car. God. What's the cost of diesel or actual though? might do Diesel's even more expensive. So that that's gonna be a budget of about I would say $700 a month

[00:24:37] So you're saying seven thousand eight eight thousand no, I better do nine thousand I don't want to be caught in the middle road with no no diesel. No, you don't want to run out of gas

[00:24:46] Okay, so we go Jesus this 38 and a half thousand I've left but I'm sorry about gas is more expensive than your rent Oh, and that only sends me into more of a fury. I think oh, yes

[00:24:57] Oh, there's nothing that will make you want to murder more than traffic and gas prices in Los Angeles Okay, so I have I have my backstory done. I don't like writers. I'm targeting the ones who bolder slug lines I have my vehicle. I

[00:25:12] Need a mask right? I need some you need some sort of iconography that's something that sets you apart. Yeah That's that's very important But here's the nice thing you buy the one and then you keep it

[00:25:23] You're trying to wash it or anything. Yeah, like after a while it gets no you don't of anything Jason and Michael Myers No, they just they just yeah, it gets uglier and nastier every it kind of it kind of evolves

[00:25:34] Although if you know art the clown which you probably don't because you don't watch a lot of horror art The clown launders his clothes wait is this what's the what's the movie he's in he's in a movie called terrifier

[00:25:44] Which if you don't watch horror, I don't recommend you watch that. No, I haven't seen it I've seen like he's a very popular figure. Yeah, I've seen pictures of him went Oh, yeah, and in Google about it is and like this sounds disgusting. Oh, it's oh

[00:25:58] It's it's completely depraved, but what I loved is at the top of the second movie The first you open up the movie with him in the laundromat Stark naked washing his clothes because they were very messy from the last one You know he's got to do it

[00:26:16] He's art the clown which is you know, I mean arts a fairly That's a fairly, you know middle of the road name. All right, that's short for our target I think it is. Yeah, right art the clown is he a

[00:26:30] Regular human being does he like no he so it turns out he's not he's like some sort of weird torture demon Pennywise the clowns are doing oh, he's a common noise He's a clown. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, um

[00:26:43] Brung on it do you think it'll be a mask? Yeah, I would have to be a mask What's your favorite mask be a mask or something? Oh God? What's a great mask that no one is utilizing? Should I get a mask? Oh, that's who Mike Meyers mask is

[00:27:00] Mask of someone in it of a celebrity. It's a it's a mask of William Shatner Should I go that route? Maybe not William Shatner, but should I get it? Yeah, not not William Shatter

[00:27:10] But somebody else yeah like a good like like what's a good celebrity mask to get worst celebrity masks? Oh, there's some bad ones in here bad ones. They're all terrifying

[00:27:19] God Sarah Palin, I mean that scares everybody Sarah Palin would scare the shit out of a lot of people Okay, the worst celebrity mask from going into the check these out. Yeah, there's a Jesus. I don't even know who these are though Oh, these are terrifying

[00:27:34] Okay, I know that's Ronald Reagan It's Ronald Reagan views like melted that looks like Hillary Clinton it kind of does yeah no idea Yeah, this Germans looks no idea Maybe okay, that's my

[00:27:57] Geez what is that? I'd know idea. That's Margaret Thatcher Margaret that you're gonna lead I think so far That's the scariest mask I've ever seen that's print. That's just Prince Charles King King Charles. Yeah That looks that's uncanny

[00:28:12] Is a choice although I kind of I thought that was George Washington it looks like George Washington I do not it needs to be a film person, but not

[00:28:22] Yeah, it does need to be somebody in film. There's Mick Jagger who's who's starred in a few movies hang on a minute I think I have an idea so did you ever see that controversy about child above and writing community?

[00:28:33] Yeah, that he was like getting into festivals that were meant for other people right yeah He was doing not for major celebrities. He was doing the thing in the Simpsons were Homer Enter as a contest for children and wins under like he beat his brains out where yeah

[00:28:47] Yeah, the the award in this green writing contest would be you getting contact with People in Hollywood and in child above Yeah, thanks the man who finishes the movie with Brad Pitt directed by Steven Spielberg. Yeah Yeah, yeah, he went he wins the the local film festival

[00:29:07] Ruins everything. Oh, he hammered everyone What what a racket the film festivals are but he does But he did have this mask But I think he has some movie about it's a child above come to kill people so I can't take him

[00:29:22] Can't take his mask. He already done it. He's already got that mask. Yeah, he's a cannibal. That's it Well, William Shatner is rather beloved and so I think it was interesting to kind of flip

[00:29:31] Flip it on the other side and kind of if you take the color out of his face Like who's a beloved celebrity right now like a tailor swift that might get so political. I don't want to deal with that

[00:29:40] That's weird. I haven't even I don't even know much about it, but it just seems that's really political Beloved beloved screenwriter, that's it. That's what I should go for

[00:29:52] Again people that no one's ever heard of no people are yeah, you have to think of people who did they haven't heard Yeah, um Oh jrr. Tolkien. What did he even look like? Oh Or just looks like a nice man. Yeah old England

[00:30:07] I could go the old English route like the attire and stuff old suit mask like that Nobody'd be scared of you so you could get off the close to people. It's kind of smart

[00:30:19] I could do that. That'll be very good. Yeah. Well, I don't I don't think the mask is going to be that lifelike So I think they would be I can walk up and they're like oh he looks like an old

[00:30:31] Like an old halloween out first of jr. Tolkien. If you find um, I'm also that's weaving avine under there I'm also aware that this podcast is probably out in march. So they'd be like it's not even near halloween What is he walking around?

[00:30:46] Would you go with that our way who's the guy who does game of thrones? I think that's another famous writer, right? Oh, oh, yeah, George R. R. Martin another rr George R. R. Martin Yeah, I could go that route I tell you like

[00:31:01] I have the glasses you have the glasses They're not quite like them But yeah And I have that I could be in the hat and everything and a pointy beard And a lot of people would want a lot of screenwriters would want to talk to you

[00:31:11] You'd actually you would actually draw them in really easily I like how you think this mask is going to be so lifelike that people go Just because you got mistaken by some back in florida 80s for Dave Grohl It happens all the time America's a massive country

[00:31:28] People never know. Okay. So do you think George R. R. Martin? I should go with him. Oh, yeah No, he's terrifying. Queen V. Noreen looks a little like George R. R. Martin Absolutely fine. Okay. Besides that. I don't have any other features, but I think I probably should

[00:31:42] Oh, I was gonna say here about the meaner and stuff. You know how freddy kruger he's he's he's Good for a gag apparently. Oh, yeah loves a good pun I mean, I love a good pun too, but

[00:31:54] Should I just avoid that does any other horror characters act like that? I feel like they all started to maybe then So, I mean, yeah, there are there are evolutions, right? But certain characters I think they kind of stick to their thing Some are more stoic than others

[00:32:08] Um, but I mean if you wanted to lean into what your mask looks like, you know, George R. R. Martin loves it Loves a good sex scene. You could just be, you know, oh I'm a creep Yeah, he goes to be a total creep

[00:32:20] Uh, okay. I was gonna go a different energy there Yeah, may may yeah, well let's table that one and My way we can combine efforts here because all he was thinking the other thing George R. R. Martin some people

[00:32:32] Know him far or are kind of accusing far is that like his his story has gone on now Where's the dragons during that sort of thing like where's the right? Yeah. Oh, yeah

[00:32:41] He's delaying. He's delaying the end of the book. Yeah, so I could again. I don't know anything about horror, but I Always believed that like with freddy kruger when that was so successful

[00:32:52] One of the successful things about it was that he was making quips when he was killing people and people are like Oh, I haven't seen this before you have michael moyers. That's just very killed murder done whereas He then brought a new kind of version to a

[00:33:05] Horror character, right? I could be wrong about but I was like no no he did So do I then have a different trying to do the same but instead of making quips or anything else my defining Uh personality trait Is that I tell

[00:33:20] Long-winded tales that never get to the actual sex like it's me saying right. I was in a nightclub Hey, right so get this to get this right the saw blade is inching closer to your head

[00:33:31] But we have seven minutes and just go on and on and it never gets to so did I kiss her Never gets there. Yeah, I think that'll be good. Um, yeah lots of anticipation and no payoff

[00:33:44] Yeah, yeah, and that's yeah, so that's my character. I am going into This i'm an i was 18. I was in a nightclub Get this i'm in morocco. It's 1973. Yeah, just me. Yeah, and then I was born and then I first said guvati when I was teen

[00:34:01] Okay, jor- quivy norina sounding great A quivi Is quivi a separate name from norin is it all one thing are you calling me norin? No, no, no, no I'm sorry. So you have kevin ryan, right? Yeah, and then the kevin part is quivine

[00:34:20] One more quivine. Okay, and then the ryan part is o ryan Oh ryan And if I don't sound like quivi norine to me Oh people are gonna call me that the feng american's are going to say quivy norin. Hey, it's quivy norin

[00:34:39] Um, I don't know like I know if if I was a lady it would then be quivy me ryan Yes, and if you're a boy, it's quivy norin not quivy norin Okay, we might need to okay. I'm too late now. I have to go at quivy norin

[00:34:55] It's too late. We're we're we're dug in on this dug in on it. I'm after I mean, how How do I mark it myself? Should I go out with? You're a script doctor what and a good you're a script doctor and you're a good one

[00:35:08] Oh, I kind of meant do I hand out cards saying be careful You know the way they'll have uh, uh like Uh, not fairytale a um nursery rhyme that talks about some character. Oh, yes Or they'll have a tail or something. I didn't yeah

[00:35:23] Have a freddy's got one two freddy's coming for you. Yeah, that's that's the big thing So I was thinking that more so then become a script doctor and work Now it's just now it's just a very very involved business that you have to run with a gimmick

[00:35:41] Just like oh, he's really good fleshed out the turd act but Weird Yeah I don't know. I'm just getting more working. I'm like, oh Yeah, you got it now you got a file for an s-corp in the state of california

[00:35:53] That's 800 bucks a year. Maybe when I was in that cult I'm living with for the next year When they're all saying you all need to become lawyers because I feel like that's what they do when you're in a cult Um, I said I can become a script doctor

[00:36:05] So I'm much doing that to pay my dues to the cult. Yes. It makes sense So I'm not getting any extra money out. I still have turkey and I have thousands Yeah, you got a lot of money left over we we've missed something drastically

[00:36:16] I think they're doing well from so I think if I Was to hire you know how in horror movies you'd have the kids who start singing nursery rhymes. Yep I think I need to hire a choir. Oh, that's good. Right. I know like a whole choir

[00:36:31] I wonder higher Choir I think that's the only way Get off george r martin george r martin refused to leave my screen Very very on brand for george r martin. Oh, Jesus. Okay. Oh, right does does does arrange that is Goes from one end to the other. Oh

[00:36:52] Usually it's kids, right who'd say a scary like lullaby or something. Yeah, it's like creepier kids do it Yeah, do you think it'd be creepier kids choirs must be cheap? Oh, yeah, they'd be sad

[00:37:04] It's like what are they they're doing this for like 10 bucks. It's like you get some of these people There's this concert now. I think this is on northern england. So I might need to fly him over after fucks it

[00:37:13] Well, that sounds expensive. Yeah, okay. It's in LA, right? Yeah, I would do quiet. I would yeah choir for higher Los Angeles Um higher us angeles carol Let's take a there higher us this to the bit we want. Yeah, I don't care. Give me a rate

[00:37:30] When they don't post the rate it means you can't afford it Uh, I'd put in cost here on average professional choir one to three thousand that sounds about right But is that for one performance? It's probably for one performance. So it's like for every kill

[00:37:43] You're gonna have to pay them no group kills if that's the case. I'm not paying two thousand for every kill But I mean you consider Like I would consider a very good horror film has about 14 kills in it. That's that's a high kill count

[00:37:57] So let's say it's only 14 kills Let's say it's it's on the high end because it's Los Angeles So 14 times three thousand just just over my budget. That's 30 Welcome to hollywood pal. I know no no, we're gonna have to group them We're gonna have to group them a bit

[00:38:13] So if there's three thousand and there's 14 and there's gonna have to be some twins and triplets in there There's just there's there's just co-writers some some roommates. There's definitely co-writers Definitely, so I think if we can knock that down to eight

[00:38:27] To eight kills but but one of the co-writers actually co-writes from Connecticut So that's entirely across the country. You have to fly that writer in or Fly yourself to Connecticut to kill them one of the two get a chance. Why did you pick Connecticut? I have to go

[00:38:40] I Because this is how it works. It's how the business works the co one of the co-writers definitely doesn't live in Los Angeles Right, Connecticut. I'm only doing one of these guys are enough line Connecticut. Where is Connecticut?

[00:38:52] Connecticut, is there you go? Yep. Syracuse. Okay. Oh, yeah, you're gonna have to you're also gonna have to rent a car So you might as well add that to your no, I'll pick them up No, but I mean

[00:39:03] You're still gonna have you don't have a car in Connecticut. You're gonna have to fly to Los Angeles I'm not no no no no no. No, I will I will fly in them here. I will I will tell him get on a plane

[00:39:12] All right, okay, and we'll say I'm going for a green space here. I'll do it in I'll do it in and no killing on a budget. No, I'll do it in May. Okay It's only one way though. So I'll that'll be fine. Um

[00:39:25] He's like, why is my ticket one way? Is I add to we'll we'll sus that out when you get back Oh, this isn't too bad. Um Okay, that's cheap enough 150 we'll say 160 euro that'll cover him

[00:39:36] However, this this this screenwriter has a manager and that manager insists that they they fly business class Are you fucking kidding me? Sure. I don't know. Listen, you want to get your kills done or not But this is how we move in Hollywood

[00:39:51] But I'm only looking for an amateur screenwriter. I don't care what the although I suppose I'd be mad on this Trust me that you're gonna find the amateur screenwriter who has a manager and they're going. Yeah, he flies business class

[00:40:04] That's that's the only way you're getting them out there. They have to go through American airlines A lot of work the fair just jumped It's gonna be massive. This is gonna be a lot more expensive. I don't even know one way one way trip

[00:40:18] I don't even know how to look for business class I'll help you. I've got my need to help on this. Okay, so I mean I will I'll help you. Yep plan travel. Okay Book my okay, so where am I going?

[00:40:31] Let's do some flights. Yep. You're gonna book flights Where's my book flights? Right there up there. See under plan travel go flights. Oh, okay. Yeah Just a tutorial on how to book uh one way. Okay sounds good from air one way we're going Los Angeles, please to

[00:40:51] I'd say kinetic kinetic there you go hard for kinetic that'll go. Okay, that's where you want. Okay, and then dates They don't show you the green days. You're just gonna have to decide you said it was may 15

[00:41:02] I think I said yeah, let's see if it's any cheaper one adult. All right, let's see Okay, oh, you'll see you hit search here and it'll show you right Why am I flying into this? Okay run sleepy to eight kids. I just want to point out

[00:41:15] You're sticking to eight kills. That's good. That's a good average. Okay now that was three thousand So I'm just gonna put here that's 21 thousand. So I'm down to 17 and a half thousand I haven't even got the material to kill him with

[00:41:27] No, no we have we have to figure out what the actual The apparatuses that you kill these people with Wait, but was that that was basic economy or that was main cabin. You're gonna have to go first class Yeah, first class 800 first

[00:41:42] 829 euros. Okay. So yeah, that's right right a thousand some dollars I mean base. I'm gonna knock off the housing because I'm probably gonna have to give him a fucking limo

[00:41:49] Wait, it's agent. I mean you do have to have a at least uber xl which is a from lax That's gonna be 120 bucks one way. Can I just take it that oh wait that was going from la to

[00:42:03] That's going la to kinetic it so you have to reverse that Ah for okay first of all I will reverse this I'm just gonna put in This 300 euro to get there, right?

[00:42:14] I'm flying that I'm gonna where I'm just doubling that that's 600 euro so I can kill that fucking agent It's worth it to put it in there you add that guy So now I have to go back and I have to go from kinetic it uh, why in

[00:42:30] It's connect. It's it's spelled connect. Yeah, there you go Oh Yeah, connect it. It's an awful trip. Okay. No forget. It's one way you put a round trip in there

[00:42:39] I did I did it's one way. Okay. I can search right lowest fair. Yeah, please. I think it's safe to Okay, it's 600 euro. I'll put in another 100 just if I want to get something to eat and then you know

[00:42:51] Yeah, he's gonna need per diem which is which is flexible Uh, but per diem I would say is I think probably around seven or eighty dollars. Oh, it's actually cheaper It's cheaper. I'm still getting rid of that agent. That's ridiculous

[00:43:02] But well now you have the money now you've saved a bit of money so you can actually kill the agent on top of that Okay, 16,300 I'm left with that's a massive amount just to get a choir in so that you hear the rhyme

[00:43:18] I didn't have to think of the rhyme as well. I'm gonna have to get a um writer and type You're gonna have to get a jingle writer. Yeah, I'm gonna look on up work which is not letting me in

[00:43:28] Yeah, they want you to create your account. No, I'm not creating a account. Okay higher higher a jingle writer That's not gonna be cool. Well fiver freelance. There we go. Yeah fiver is always good to save a buck

[00:43:40] And that's asking me to sign in as well. Of course. Yes. Okay. Oh, I say we sign you in. Oh, here we go. No, no, I'm fine Jingles, do I just print jingles? Yeah

[00:43:50] Okay, quality quality jingles from 98 pounds. Now he's only producer for your business podcaster radio, but Yeah, that's fine. Hey, yeah, it's 100 euro 100 euro is fine. Thanks. That's it. What a steal Fiverr always come into the rescue. Brilliant. Okay, so I have my jingle. I'm warning people about me

[00:44:08] I've eight kills lined up. I need a weapon, don't I for my quivine orine A weapon's important and it's also I think important that the weapon be sort of iconic in its own way You know freddy's got the glove jason's got the machete

[00:44:23] Michael Myers has the giant kitchen knife Um, you know your favorites. Who is your favorite? My favorite is uh jason vorhees because he's not he's not a bad guy He's a tortured soul. You know, he was wrong

[00:44:37] Right. And so he's just kind of coming back and and by the way in the first movie big spoiler alert for everybody who didn't see the 1980 film He's not even the killer his mom is who was getting vengeance on a bunch of people for her son dying

[00:44:49] And then he saw her at the end get beheaded by somebody so all he's like these guys beheaded my mom Who wouldn't be upset did he not so who is he in the first movie like is he

[00:45:00] He's not in the first movie. He's not in her at all He's not in it and he doesn't get the face mask the hockey mask until part three Which is friday the 13th 3d by the way

[00:45:11] And i'm gonna recommend everybody go watch friday the 13th 3d in 3d because if you don't it's the most ridiculous film you've ever seen Oh, so was the was the third one really successful then?

[00:45:24] They the first like four were very successful and I think the fifth the fifth one um The fifth one did not do well because they they went like oh, it's a copycat killer and everybody hated that

[00:45:36] Right. And so they resurrected him in six and then he became undead. So he was actually a living person for the first Three or four films and then because technically he's not the first film. Yeah. Yeah, yeah

[00:45:48] And then they decided like he saw iconic. We just need to keep him around He's on day just keep him around and in part six They literally resurrect him like frankenstein and then and then he is undead from that point on and then it gets interesting

[00:45:59] At one point he goes to space. Is he the villain or is it at this point? he's antihero he's he's I'm trying he became an anti hero in jason or freddy versus jason always freddy was the villain

[00:46:14] Freddy was the villain of that movie and get this jason freddy versus jason is 100% A freddy kruger movie. It's a nightmare on elm street movie that happens to have jason in it But freddy is the bad guy and jason is the hero

[00:46:29] Ah, and then oh, I mean sort of he also he also indiscriminately murders a lot of people but hero nonetheless Okay, a weapon. I have I run this idea by I think if it's going to be writer Centered to hold murders and stuff

[00:46:43] Should it be something got to do with writing now? I like I'm not going to hit them with a typewriter No, that would be unwieldy. Yeah, I think I think people can dodge typewriters But I would it be more fun?

[00:46:53] Like if if you were qui vine orine because you might take on dismantling when I'm tired I might have to yeah part seven Would you like is it more fun to have a distinct weapon like an iconic weapon that you use? I think so. Yeah, then

[00:47:07] Oh, I'll set up traps and different things like that I mean if you want to go the traps route you kind of get pigeonholed into every movies about traps

[00:47:17] And then you go and I think that's the hardest thing with the soft franchise is that they went like everything has to be a trap, doesn't it? Like there's no way around it. We have to do traps every time Yeah

[00:47:27] Whereas like sometimes you can do a trap movie and then the next movie you're like no I'm not doing traps this time this time. I'm doing you know That's true And I feel like you'd have more like if you're picking a weapon

[00:47:38] You'd end up coming up with new ideas on how to use it or where you use it or it'll all feel a little bit different Yeah, you know, I mean I'll tell you this like it's nice to have the iconic weapon

[00:47:49] But I don't I'm not like ah, there's the weapon like that's never the part that excites me. It's the creative kills It's just find a creative way to kill people every single time I mean Jason is almost plotless. So it's just about the kills

[00:48:02] Wait, could I do it then where? Okay, so this isn't about traps, right And it'll always be different. I think and I'm not hiring a full crew for this, but I could hire

[00:48:13] Uh a studio like a lot not a lot, but um like a warehouse and I could make up my own little short film sets I'll do labor. I'll do all the labor on that. I'm not paying people

[00:48:27] Well, you could always go to the local colleges and look for students to help out No one might look there be film strikes again. I'll be at the center I'll have Sean Astin out giving out about me. I don't want that

[00:48:40] Quivy Noreen is a is a union buster. Yeah, I'll be best friends of us a guy with for for Warner Brothers David Zaslaw Zaslaw. Yeah, he's pulling the strings Yeah, I mean, that's a great way to be a heel could be buddy buddy with zaslaw

[00:48:58] But for my eight kills then I get higher eight movie sets And drop you could do eight separate movie sets. Yeah, right and then go, oh, you think you're a great horror writer

[00:49:09] Well, how about this and there'll be it'll just be black or no, I'll just drop the green screen and say I'll put that in later Yeah, we're putting it in later. Yeah We'll do it in post. Yeah, um fix it in post is what we often say

[00:49:20] Okay, so so hire a film session Hollywood, right? Yeah, so so look for a green screen Hollywood. Oh, is that what it's called? Well, no, I mean that's what you're looking for right? You're looking for a proper green screen

[00:49:31] Yeah, but I mean not just the green screen that Didn't like I need a location. You need a green screen studio. Yeah I'm gonna share the screen so I need your help again after that just like the um point Like with the flights. Yeah Okay, so green screen

[00:49:47] Location or studio. I would say green screen studio. Yeah, Los Angeles. Oh, Los Angeles Green screen studio rentals 8,000. That's perfect. There you go right on the right turn gigster. Okay price. Let's take a look Abandoned vintage apartment 100 euro a hundred an hour. Look at that. It is creepy

[00:50:10] That's a creepy. I don't even I think that's a I generated. I think that's absolute bullshit And there's no way that that By the way, I'm not even joking. I have a music video coming up that I absolutely need a place for

[00:50:21] I need you to send me that specific link It says like wait, but is this just a green screen like here's what you can put on the screen I don't yeah

[00:50:32] Is it is it like assets a wonderful place to shoot scenes shoot scenes very communicative easy to work with Abandoned vintage apartment just nine miles from downtown la grungy wallpaper stained carpets

[00:50:44] Oh my gosh 100 bucks an hour minimum one hour. Wow. That's a good deal. Normally it's minimum six So then this location features vintage kitchen living room bedroom two bathrooms two bathrooms and the central enclosed atrium

[00:50:56] Where lights can be placed for all four rooms. This is a good brilliant. Okay. I love this place Yeah, do send me this link. Do not forget to send me this link. I actually need this place for good for an upcoming shoot This would be perfect

[00:51:11] Now we're doing production work on the side here parking for 15 cars. This is fantastic. Okay Oh my god truck motorhome parking on property Perfect. Oh my god. I love this open six days a week six to six No seven sunday monday tuesday wednesday torsor friday saturday

[00:51:27] The whole all the days all the hours. I mean it's abandoned. Why wouldn't it be open? Yeah, like who is renting this out? It's if it's if it's truly abandoned. What are they up to? It is On a queevee noreen. It's difficult. Dun dun dun

[00:51:41] Who has there you go this guy's on your in on your in a jay's more on your end of the year Serial killer spectrum. Yeah, it's a bit unfortunate. He's pulling one on us. I get we're gonna we're gonna show up getting ready to kill people

[00:51:53] He's there. Okay. I should contact him All all those reviews are AI generated that fella even looks like a young georgia or martin Hold on a minute right a mirror. That's peter jackson and georgia or martin melded together off an AI That's what that is. Okay. So

[00:52:11] He said why was it 100 euro for an hour Yep, right. That's perfect. I think I need two hours for each kill You need two hours per kill But just to set up and I'm gonna be telling a very

[00:52:22] I suppose brandy to say about the time I once tried to hook up with a lady. That's true That's true. We need two hours per kill. So you're looking at 1600 there minimum 1600 Um, you could get this done one day. This is brilliant 1600 Uh down to no wait 14

[00:52:39] thousand I've left Right. Um, okay. All right. I think this is actually going really well. Okay. So I need do we have the choir costs in here? Yeah, that was oh wait. Oh, shit. What did I do for this?

[00:52:51] Choir cost how much was I saying for that? Did I even hire doing one it was one I don't think you'd hired them yet, but it was between one and three thousand dollars Oh, it was because I had 38,000. I said I'll spend 21 on that

[00:53:03] Ah, okay. That's 17. Yeah. That's how we lost it. Okay. Fine. Yeah, I'll put that in a new column 14600 um right I I was just thinking there Jesus. Do I need the internet?

[00:53:16] Do you do I don't know people are gonna ask for wi-fi if they if you don't have wi-fi They're gonna get upset when you say people are asking for wi-fi. You mean the victims Yeah, they're gonna come in and go. Oh, what's the wi-fi here?

[00:53:26] They're gonna immediately demand it the minute they show up on set like where's the coffee Where's the diet coke and where's the wi-fi? So you need catering? Ah for fuck's sake how much we're gonna be catering for a full day

[00:53:38] I know you think you will but trust me as an independent filmmaker you wear too many hats and then it starts to get screwy And then something gets and if you forget the coffee. Oh my god, they'll walk. They'll just walk

[00:53:50] So how much would I be paying for about? How did I say eight hours? No 16 hours work those 16 hours of craft services So I would look up craft services Los Angeles, you know single day, right? This is getting expensive

[00:54:04] Trust me. You want someone else handling the food craft services LA What is Ruby Sander? Yep That is yeah, that's it craft services Top 10 craft service companies. No that might not yeah, you don't want the top 10 because they're expensive Kit and Kaboodle. Okay I mean the name alone

[00:54:24] Services, that's what I wanted. I think right see what they offer me. Um, they got a nice charcuterie board there I don't want full service drop-off service. Yeah, I need drop off service Um small crew 25. That's 25 to 40 people. That's you Okay, 14 bucks a person minimum headcount 25

[00:54:42] Okay, I'm only killing one Listen, there's minimums you have to deal with minimums in Los Angeles. Otherwise, people you know people can't take the gig man They got to go where the money's at so what's that 25 by 14 is um, if the number god

[00:54:55] I used to go to mat It's also drove me deranged Um, also you need to add 200 dollars for prep and 150 for drop-off set off and on top of that I just had 150 for for kit rental. Well, what kit rental? What's that?

[00:55:09] So so they got a kit rental fee They got a drop-off fee and they got a prep fee and all that total is 500 bucks So 25 times 14 plus 500 and that's and that's your rate for the craft services

[00:55:21] But what kiss make me sound like this is what I mean. No, they're yeah, but they're gonna put out a little table There'll be grapes. There's gonna be uh Gummy bears there's gonna be things that people want and they're gonna expect it

[00:55:32] 350 that it's a hundred and fifty euro. I'm paying 850 for craft services is pretty good But I have to do that eight times Yeah, you gotta no no that's for the day if you can get it done in a 16 hour day

[00:55:43] We can make this happen. I'm not doing 16 hours in one day. That's madness. This is Hollywood You have you have to do a minimum 12 hour day How do I? How do I unless you want to do two ways two days and then you got to double it

[00:55:56] No, but then if I do see I was thinking if I have two hours in an abandoned apartment, right? I can bring a victim in Get rid of them and then get rid of the body

[00:56:05] But if I'm going oh Jesus Jim and Mary are coming in at four Like it's like I know what you okay. I got I have Sebastian like I'm putting my producer hat on here. You can't afford to do two days You're gonna need to do a 16 hour day

[00:56:20] So what you need is to hire a dumpster to dispose of bodies as after every hour So you're gonna need a dumpster dumpster rental. I think that was on the fourth floor

[00:56:30] So I'm just launching the bodies out to fourth floor into the dumpster. That's perfect. Yeah, just said you Just there's this blood and gore dripping down the side of the building. What's all that about uh queen norine

[00:56:42] Do you know what I might do? How much would it be safe for two and euro? So I said 850 there right I'm gonna pump that up 50 for craft services an extra 200 I'm what the extra 200 because there's going to be overtime because you're going 16 hours

[00:56:55] But I'm doing anyone working. Why am I who am I paying overtime to you? Well, trust me that you know, they You're gonna get overtime charges on put you got to put these bumpers in your budget ahead of time or you get surprised on the back end

[00:57:07] And you don't want your craft services guy coming You don't want him coming around looking for that extra 250 bucks if it's baked in You're good to go I was going to add in an extra 200 I wasn't for all the time

[00:57:21] But what it was is I'm gonna rent the place out for an extra two hours Because I'm going to get in some practice on aiming for the bin. Yeah fair enough Do you mean I'll throw out like

[00:57:29] I mean you tell the guys when they bring the bin you go I need it butted up right against the wall here and and remove the flaps so that way just oh no

[00:57:37] You need the flaps the flaps need to be facing toward the street. See I'm thinking logistics now The flaps have to face towards the street and they're wide open You toss the body you run downstairs

[00:57:47] You close the flap over and then you're greeting the next group. Perfect. Okay. I mean, it's a stressful day. I won't like It's a it's a long day. I mean listen any any day we we we fashion out at least minimum 14 hours for a day

[00:58:01] So you're going 16. That's not bad. Yeah, but you know what you do a lot of waiting around I am on the goal here constantly Yeah, big vain fire Yeah, you just call it that's big you just wrote big bun which will be a very interesting

[00:58:16] That's gonna be a very interesting search result. Hey man, instead of a bin I can just get these handsome burly guys These big bun men I would write I would write uh, yeah big bin. I don't know that they use the word bin in Los Angeles

[00:58:34] Our dumpster rental prices. There we go. There you go dumpster Dumpster is the word we use in America I think bin sounds nicer. Oh, they say what you're best for Um, oh, you're gonna need a rolling dumpster

[00:58:46] These are too big. These are we're not going to be able to we'd have to we're not going to be able to get that in a lot Then I got a higher teamsters if you want to do that and you can't afford teamsters

[00:58:55] No, no, but hold on a minute. I thought that lot said 15 cars. How big is this? 15 cars that's huge. That's a 20-yard dumpster So now I need a gang boss and you don't want if I start hiring union teamsters

[00:59:07] You're not going to be able to you're going to blow through your budget very quickly We need to go smaller. So you need to go smaller dumpster big rolling dumpsters I I would take out big because I think

[00:59:19] Big is your you can't afford big. We're not on big budget Rented Yeah, I have to get 16 bodies into them So you're gonna rent two smaller dumpsters. You can't rent that big one. You're just it's just too expensive Rented dumpster. Was that the same one?

[00:59:34] That could have been the same one now. I could be going into no, okay. Oh this looks better. Oh, there you go That's a little something. That's a 40 yarder. Let's see. We need something smaller than 40 yards Uh dumpster rentals

[00:59:45] Something smaller. Oh here we go. Here we go. No 20 is too big. Oh, there you go three yard You want you want? Yeah, let's try the 10 yard. Let's do the 10 yard 10 yards It's gonna ask me it's gonna like I'm not applying for a quote because I

[01:00:00] I just want um Google should tell you how much how much to rent a three yard dumpster. There we go. That's that's your google search to rent a trick But they look like barely bigger than a body So you'll need two of them

[01:00:15] Or you can do I change it to 10 yard dumpster try 10 yard Okay, yeah, because like first of all the aim has to be spot on and I'm gonna need more It does will a couch fit in a 10 yard dumpster. There we go. Yeah, they do

[01:00:25] Oh, you know that's not that's not that's not expensive. Look at that 10 yard dumpster 522 bucks Where does it say that? Right there big rents up above. Yeah. Yeah, there it is right there. Oh Yes, 522. Okay, so I get two of them. That's another thousand

[01:00:41] Oh my gosh, but they're gonna need covers. So just budget in for that as well Because we don't want people seeing the bodies. Yep. The flaps are no flaps on this Yeah, but that can't be that much Surely Explore all some

[01:00:56] Now we're we're deep diving into the dumpster rental business business This is 10 to 10 yard is more than enough. I think they should make saw 11 where he's just figuring out the logistics

[01:01:08] This is a much better move. I mean some of some of the saw movies have gone this way Oh really? Yeah, I see but I think you get two three yard dumpsters, which is about 250 bucks a piece You get one of let's say 500 bucks

[01:01:21] You get two yard dumpsters you put them right next to each other They have enough flaps you should be able to get eight bodies in those but they look really small. I mean I mean 10 one. I mean, oh, yeah, we could take the 10 one

[01:01:33] But I you do you want to hide those bodies and they don't come with that big flap Okay, trust me. You're gonna want to you're going to want the two three yarders at 500 bucks a piece

[01:01:43] Okay, right. So we know and those are probably day day rentals. Yeah, I'm only doing one day. So that's good, right? I can say you're only doing one day. Am I doing one day? Jesus? Um Yeah, pick up the next morning. Okay. I need a fancy weapon

[01:01:57] Yeah, oh, so you're gonna have to go to an armorer and in Los Angeles. There's a few What? I am I But I need something that's It's iconic right the pen is my year than the sword big pain. That's the most expensive big pen. Yeah

[01:02:13] But it might be too small The most expensive pen in the world is probably made of titanium and gold leaf the folger nocturnus eight million dollars Yeah, I don't have money for that

[01:02:23] Okay, maybe no. Oh, have you ever gone on to the james edition? No, what's that james edition is well I don't know if you have our goss as well, but it's it's um market place for rich snobs

[01:02:35] Um, I've never heard of this place. Yeah, I've I've long oh welcome back kevin ryan Apparently you're on james edition all the time I am i am usually on a joint work when I bought a lot of tickets Are you hiding that there's far more budget than 69 000?

[01:02:52] There I only check it when I've done the lottery and I'm like well, I'm definitely winning tonight So I might as well look at the house. I love that

[01:03:01] Now I know where to go for my lottery fantasies. Do they have any oh they have rentals, but uh just jets and yachts Oh I might look into doing a big I know we're after spending money and

[01:03:15] Location, but I might do a big set piece one just as a statement murder uh in public, you know Oh, yeah fair enough. So I might like kind of the grand finale like yeah, just something something big, but I'll get that

[01:03:28] I don't know how to get rid of this screen. There we go electibles. No jewelry I thought there might be pins here, but uh dollar our watches. Hmm It's just the weirdest hunt for a weapon that I've ever been on

[01:03:40] Yeah, I can't really do watch can I no I don't think wow watch has the watch doesn't have that kill connotation A pen is pretty easy because it's clearly like a stabbing apparatus. How about just how about just large writing pen?

[01:03:53] See what see what comes up there writing pen? Yeah, I don't need I can ship it. It's fine. Oh, that's a fancy one the brown pewter. Oh, look at these That's a fancy Hmm

[01:04:03] Oh, it's only 38 pounds and that was a euros. That's euros isn't it? That's your also That's a bit more I think like oh look at this one big pen is No, I won't click on that side. That's actually a difference That's that's part of big ones Okay

[01:04:24] Let's scroll up There was one that that had a scale to it that I thought was pretty good It's and it looked it looks cost effective this one. Oh that one right there. That's a no up there Yeah, see right there There there it is right there

[01:04:37] Hundreds of that's on amazon. Oh no scroll up just a bit just a bit like half a scroll up. Oh, okay now There it is see right there right? Oh, yes. Sorry. Yes. Yes. You fell out the hand is He's wonderfew. There it is. Yep. Yes

[01:04:54] He's even doing the stab motion. It's perfect stab motion jumble pen with 10 refills That's even better easy grip never lose. Oh look at that It's oh my god, that's perfect. You never lose so I'm gonna win in the game of murder

[01:05:10] You never lose and it was three euro. So I don't even need to include that I can find that off the victims I can ask them for money Okay, I Yeah, I was thinking I know I bought this thing, but maybe I'll go on a yacht or something

[01:05:26] Um or what's something kind of no do you know what I grand show down? I mean realistically What do you got I could go to um

[01:05:37] Austin Austin film festival do a murder there. Ah, yes. Oh, I mean that's the epicenter right all the writers come to Austin Film Festival Fuck all those people. I'm going from type of thing, right?

[01:05:48] Are you a second rounder? No, are you an are you an Austin film fest second rounder? No, I'm a first rounder I'm proud of us. Wait a minute. You're a second rounder, aren't you? Um, you are a second rounder. I am a second rounder by chance

[01:06:01] It's a great film festival, but it's all yeah, it's all about screenwriters If everything culminates at the Austin Film Festival for the finale, that's fantastic I'd be there with my pain But you're gonna need tickets to the Austin film fest You're gonna need flights and hotels

[01:06:16] We got to get back on Expedia or whatever and when we need to buy tickets to the Austin Film Fest Did you go there if I could recommend the producers?

[01:06:24] Badge I have been there. Yeah, and you're gonna want all access so you're gonna need to purchase a producers badge Okay, so I'm going from I think that's uh 1000 bucks or something Um, this should be a cheap flight to Texas Austin

[01:06:41] Austin, Texas. Yeah, Austin Bergstrom and then do you know what month it's usually in is it in the end of the year Like September or something? Oh, my flights are in right second. It's like November. It's November just before Christmas

[01:06:52] I mean, what are they thinking now? I'm researching. Okay. I'll wait there. Oh, that's right. Yeah It's right right at the near the Thanksgiving holiday. Yeah when people are mad to spend money on loads of different things

[01:07:03] It's actually Halloween week. So November 30th. No wait, October. No, no October 24th through the 31st And it all ends on Halloween I mean you couldn't get more poetic than that is very nice and I'm gonna want to so you're gonna need

[01:07:19] Seven days. Yeah, you're gonna need the return flight. Jesus. So let's see what that what kind of damage we were doing flight-wise for that Yeah, but then I'm just thinking I'm gonna yeah, you didn't budget yourself enough

[01:07:28] No, I've 13,000. This is you do you you're gonna need accommodation. Yeah, but I have okay To the 260 euro 250 will say we're not and then I'm gonna go on to booking.com, right? That's got a

[01:07:41] I hope all them sponsor this podcast isn't great and getting through loads of websites I Think you might need to put this one on the actual I need to post the video of this because a lot of it is visual I mean, yeah

[01:07:56] It is great just hearing the endless tabs open You're truly an independent filmmaker now. You have 70 tabs open trying to figure out how to how to make this production happen I just had a mini existential so we're going to austin I I just saw

[01:08:11] And booking.com screened on the option where you know, you put in your location You want to go to because there's not an ender it says where are you going?

[01:08:19] And I just had a bit of a crisis when I was just like as soon as I saw that I just thought oh, I don't know Just I just gave up in my own head. Um

[01:08:28] Austin, I have no idea where this is going. I don't know. I don't know why Austin, Texas Oh my god, it's loading. That's great So we said the 24th. Well, that's what happens when you have like 300 tabs open

[01:08:42] Like I have six. Well, my world are you someone who does that because me and selena've had um, I've had issues Where she has about 80 tabs. I have I have multiple windows Yeah, well on my phone. I mean it's less but on on my on my workstation

[01:09:00] I have multiple windows and in those windows multiple tabs and in those tabs multiple like subfolders Like oh, these are all the emails so they all go into one thing These are all the locations I'm looking at they go into one thing

[01:09:12] But that's just that window then there's another window that like oh this is all podcast stuff and then that's just strictly podcast things So I have at least 75 windows open. I get to everything It just takes a long time. No

[01:09:27] No, and selena's gonna hear this and go see see and I'm like no you should have at most Five tabs open see not get me we get to it like if it's important you remember I have no less than two four six eight ten

[01:09:40] 12 14 six I have 16 tabs open on this window and another oh god. No, it's yeah I have a lot of tabs. Oh jeez. I have to keep this one. But guess what my email is always on zero

[01:09:52] I I take care of emails every day. Really? You're good for getting to that Yeah, I'm good at emails. You know, I've actually stayed at that place The central central is spelt wrong. It's not it's see not an a

[01:10:06] It's spelled very wrong. I've stayed at that exact place. That's a nice picture of it though But I think that's a little that's out of our budget. That's not it's one 1300 that's not bad actually. Yeah. Oh, but and for those dates. Oh, yeah

[01:10:18] Oh, they'll change those they'll they'll jack that price up They'll forget that it was Austin film test and the price will go up Oh, I'm gonna lock that in now though. You see that's that's where do you know what maybe?

[01:10:28] They will cancel they will cancel your they did it to my friend. They canceled his reservation They canceled it on him and they said you can rebook at this price You can't do that. They really do that. They do that all the time here

[01:10:41] You know formula one you're I'm sure you're very familiar formula one's pretty popular in europe So they had it in los vegas My friend booked a year in advance And they and they cancelled his hotel room and then they go, uh, yeah

[01:10:56] If you want your hotel room back, it's now $10,000 Like what the hell is going on? I'm going to quickly check a one-way flight from Austin to LA because I'm getting rid of that hotel manager as well

[01:11:11] Because that's just no I can't let that slide that's just and so I'm gonna add what 200 and two To this as well for the extra two hours don't complain people. This is where I become an anti hero I think that's where people

[01:11:25] I'm telling you agree with me. Um You started learning what what late late stage capitalism is actually doing to people Oh, yeah, if I want to be a true villain, I should have just been a capitalist. Um Okay, 130 or a 330

[01:11:38] I'm gonna add an extra like 500 all together just to get rid of that hotel manager But um, where do I have there we go? Okay See I was thinking I would just get one of these five star hotels then I might treat myself

[01:11:50] You know you might treat yourself. Yeah, I mean, oh there the Driscoll there it is down there You want to be at the Driscoll? Really? Yep, the Driscoll is that is the central location of the Austin Film Festival. You don't want to be traveling

[01:12:01] No, I don't no no no no no no you will you will rack up uber receipts like a like a mother So you you're gonna stay at the Driscoll for the week Although do I want that's a smart move. Do I want uber to hit me murder people?

[01:12:14] Like most people They're not as they're not reliable, they know I will say right now if you are a serial killer uber is one of the greatest companies you could benefit from Um That's how jason gets around jason vorhees gets around by uber

[01:12:33] You're like, how did he get over here so fast? If you want to slaughter an entire family, don't choose lift choose uber Yeah, um connecting people. Okay. This was what was it two I think it was pretty much 2800. Yeah, you said you three grand Um

[01:12:49] Yep, and then you're gonna need to budget in three grand and then you're gonna need to budget in at least another 1200 for food and drinks In a week minimum Yeah, all right four and a half you're going you're going to drinks after every single panel

[01:13:01] I'm okay. Yeah, and that's low honestly 1200 is low Okay, so 1200 1200 is low. I'd go I'd go 1500 Yeah, 15 is good. Okay, so that's 3000 1500 that's 4 500 Then an extra 500 for the asshole who tried to cancel my room

[01:13:22] So that's 5000 i'm spending on this this this bit, but then I have to pay for the tickets How was it travel? Oh tickets. I mean like I said you're gonna want all access so you need I'll look it up for you here if I can

[01:13:36] uh austin film fest producers badge You're gonna need the producers badge. Let's see how much that is. Okay. I'm in there And okay, so oh that's not bad 650 five dollars

[01:13:48] Oh, that's good. Okay. I'm not gonna. I'm not going to murder any producer. Yeah, that is not oh wait No, but it's no hold on it's after no it's after Okay, it's 710 no yeah 655 that's correct

[01:14:01] That's not that not anymore. They're not going to hit me with any other price. No looks good That's the price. Okay, that's fine. I'm happy with that. They will well now. Here's the thing. Do you want to do do you want the pitch competition?

[01:14:13] Do you also want to go to the course? I want to pitch competition or the award luncheon those are extra Add another 30 bucks and you might as well go to the award luncheon. It's another yeah another 75 for the award luncheon okay, so it's

[01:14:26] And add another hundred for film and food which is I think Another mix of human food wait i'm already eaten i'm already spending There's a film and food Yeah, but

[01:14:35] But but if you want to actually like network with the writers you got to do to the film and food Which is like they have these little these little network pockets specifically for the people who pay for that

[01:14:45] So that's another hundred. That's you're still getting off pretty cheap I'm just going there complaining about the money because it the whole thing seems to be You're all gonna network. Here's here's food Go pay for food no drink no network. No like okay

[01:15:00] So how much am I going there now? Yeah, yeah, so it tells me you're all in spending basically You're getting pretty low the coffers are honestly. I'm not I don't think because I still have 6 000 left I think I'm doing pretty good. I know it's not bad

[01:15:13] But we're gonna have to talk permits in a bit what oh, but hold on a second. There's something we overlooked Production insurance is going to be required for that location And you got to get at least cut you got to get coverage up to a million dollars

[01:15:28] I mean you can't book the place you need to book the place, right? Yeah. Yeah, so production insurance We're looking at for that for 16 hour day dumpsters Crew 2,500 bucks for what? Why don't we get out of that if they have an accident when I killed you get well

[01:15:43] That's the only way you're gonna yeah, it's it's inch But it's insurance for the the people who actually are renting you the location. They require you provide insurance Oh my god, the guy looks like a serial killer himself. Why would he care? Okay, okay

[01:15:58] Two and a half thousand I think is is a fair it's probably gonna be higher because it's Los Angeles But let's just say two and a half thousand. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, give me something. Okay tree. Oh, jeez tree Okay, but I still have 3,800 That's fine

[01:16:11] It's not bad. Yeah 3,800 is not bad. So I could do all that I have my choir singing away I have my my you get your choir singing my fantastic

[01:16:19] Writer on the jingle writer. Wait, do we do we get a permit to have the to have noise after a certain hour? I'm gonna start. I'm not gonna be finishing past eight. Well, there's there's

[01:16:32] Don't worry if you're doing a 16 hour day. What time are we starting in the morning? This isn't important because this stuff matters We are starting let me figure out the time if you know if you can't see at home folks kev has

[01:16:44] Sunk in his face into his hands. I'm trying to work on the hours 16 hours I'm starting at five in the morning. It's a hard start But it's but but we're talking about writers here Are you gonna get a writer to show up at five in the morning?

[01:16:55] Probably not I'm gonna guess that this is actually more like we're gonna start in the early afternoon and we're gonna go through the night I think that's how I'm playing this. So, yeah, so okay, so I'm starting. I'm gonna start at four 4 p.m Yeah

[01:17:11] Yeah, 4 p.m. To 6 a.m. Okay, so you're gonna need overnight noise permits. Wait, will that be for oh, okay, okay go on. Yeah So your permits in the city of the let's see filming permits

[01:17:26] Los Angeles, let's check that out. I mean permit. Yeah, I like all the Los Angeles You have started to go over the google part googling part as I've just Other you know, it's not bad. It's not bad. That's eight hundred and 95 dollars

[01:17:41] That's that's actually pretty reasonable for Los Angeles. That's from the film la website. So 900 euro gunfire Administration fee hold on a second. There's no firing any guns. I don't believe that's my one. Okay. No guns No guns. No drones. Okay. No drones. No helicopters. No guns

[01:17:57] So we're looking pretty good. Well, I would have liked a drone to use my big pen wish All right. Well, that's another 75 bucks. That's not bad. Okay. That's all right Yeah, I'll say a hundred just so I want to get a good one

[01:18:08] But um, by the way those bins do I need are the dumpsters or whatever? Do I need to take them away? No, I think that's all covered in the cost they come the next day and they pick everything up

[01:18:17] Okay, I still have 2800. I'm okay with that. Okay. Well, that's not bad. So you got a little bit left over. Yeah Yeah, I think I okay. I mean I go around Capture all my my 16 writers. I grabbed one of them from Connecticut. That was critically the parent

[01:18:31] You had to fly a fly the one guy in I'm first class To be honest, I could do that for a year and then go away Trying to become a writer, you know, I mean, you know, is it the best you see your money? It's up for debate

[01:18:47] Well, like oh wait a minute. Are we filming this? Oh, I wasn't planning to be honest. Do you think I should I mean to release it? I mean why wouldn't you horror characters? First of all, it would you right?

[01:18:59] But you but you throw some pretty big red flags if your writer showed up to set and there was no camera equipment Yeah, baby a fake camera. I wouldn't I wouldn't be filming right A fake a fake camera

[01:19:10] I mean you my point is you're gonna at least need to rent a camera. No, but this is only a day rental This'll be cheap. I'll be honest won't be expensive

[01:19:18] My my plan is that as soon as the writer or writers get into the room. I'm I'm stabbing like it does not going to be much Chatterer like But they're not going to engage if they don't have crafty first, right?

[01:19:30] So they're going to go over to the crafty table and they're going to get coffee And they're going to eat and they're going to ask you about your what else you got going on What else are you working on right now?

[01:19:40] Do you know what this also tells me like as a writer if you're saying oh when writers show up to set They immediately go over to the food and then just scarf down all of us. I'm thinking better believe it

[01:19:50] You need to put me on a set because I'll actually be like hey, how can I help? I will just eat all the food Like when I when I first started working on sets when I was like in my 20s

[01:20:01] I think I gained 30 pounds because like there's just massive amounts of free food Constantly in this scenario. I'm running around this room panicking over permits and the fucking victims are just And you better make sure and you know, you're also going to have to create a call sheet

[01:20:20] And everybody's going to need to be on that There's there's a lot of prep work just me with my big pen with tree euro the cheapest thing is the murder weapon

[01:20:29] The cheapest thing we got is the murder weapon after getting in but they're going to be like, where's the call sheet? You know that you're gonna again, you don't want to throw up red flags if you don't have a call sheet

[01:20:36] They're writers. They're not on the call sheet. Sure. No Sometimes they are well, I mean if you're doing rewrites, you know, if you're on the set doing rewrites You're working that day, but I'm just like, oh, yeah, I can type that up right

[01:20:49] You could type that up if you want to yeah Not like I'm doing anything. I'll I'll allow it this time All out this time because we hire if we hire a unit production manager slash line producer, that's about 800 bucks a day I know and then there's

[01:21:03] And then there's prep days and then there's like minimum prep days I mean that could that could be your last 3,800 could go to your unit production manager Who would cover all of this stuff and you wouldn't have to worry about it

[01:21:12] You could just focus on the killing. Do you know what? I enjoyed Edmund I enjoy all the Edmund You're the first one I've heard of who likes that

[01:21:22] It's yeah, okay. I mean I was kind of hoping to use the the rest of the money to go on a writing course So I could go away for a year and try that and then maybe you know

[01:21:30] A bit of a myth goes on about queevin orine and then I come back in the third year and do it again well Can't you not uh, I need a camera We're gonna need to rent a camera for the day

[01:21:42] I should have done this in in in bollywood. Maybe that would have been cheaper Maybe maybe not. Yeah, it's hard to say Um, let's see camera rentals. I mean the name says it all. I mean the name the company is exactly what you want

[01:21:56] Cinema are we doing cinema camera? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, let's do cinema cameras. Come on. Look these days Daily price that's oh, oh, that's it. What a cheap. That's so cheap 250. Oh, but it's a komodo Yeah, but you're gonna need all those accessories with that one

[01:22:12] Why do I need accessories for a camera? I'm gonna need lenses. You're gonna need a lens at least No, do you not do not? I won't need lenses because I'm an artist. I'm an author. I'm going to do without lenses I'm

[01:22:24] I mean just rent one lens to go. No, no, no, no, no, it's against my art I'm I'm this is no lens No tripod. No, no filter. Are you gonna handheld? Are you gonna? Is this a handheld shoot? I'm gonna put on a table

[01:22:37] It's fine. It's the life doesn't have a filter. My murders don't have a filter neither does the camera I like how I was brought onto this podcast under the auspice that I was like a horror expert and I turned into a line producer instead

[01:22:58] So no, I think I'm fine. I will say 300 euros just whatever bullshit they try and throw at me as well I don't know buying I mean it's more than David Lynch has on some sets. So I think that's fair enough

[01:23:08] See so there two and a half thousand and I think I have satid my bloodlust Yeah, and that's and that's enough for a good writer's retreat like a little writer's workshop

[01:23:20] You could probably find one for that cheap. Oh, I could do that. Yeah, hold on. I'm gonna see a sort of writer's I'm gonna see if there's one in the later writers Writing workshop and of course I get away sure you can get one that cheap

[01:23:30] I get away with writing workshop. It's turning. Do not these are just writing groups I suppose I could go there and Just meet up with people and then you know get rid of them. I'm a screenwriting mentor. Maybe I could get oh writing a mentor There's a racket

[01:23:46] I'm after spending about 40 grand on I'm not spending 20 grand on a choir. I think You spent how much on a choir? It's the dearest thing so far

[01:23:59] And I spent like a thousand getting a writer from Connecticut. I'm gonna try and find a writer from Connecticut to be my next guest Okay, they're out there. I should have called myself tyrant instead of qui-vi-nor-in That's not right Qui-vi-nor-in

[01:24:18] I should yeah, tyrant. It would have fit with the podcast. That's a cheap one. Okay screencraft screenwriting fellowship Tyrant. Yeah tyrant. That's a good name on sale for 12 dollars Learn a lot Ty tyrant It's uh, it's the cost of four of my murder wings Um, okay

[01:24:38] No, I think okay. I think this isn't showing me anything. This is writing competitions writing. Yeah, okay I have about two and a half toes on left at the end of all that

[01:24:46] You have a little bit of money to play with in the end little bit of money But okay now here's now Now here's here's an honest assessment I've helped you get to this point and I've helped you not step on your toes Yeah

[01:25:00] And let's say in this scenario you got all your kills in on time too into six servers Yeah, there should be an on time bonus for your unit production manager. Should they're not I do Why do I don't have a unit production manager? When did I have him?

[01:25:13] I just walked you through an entire budget No, but you're taking on the mental when I Listen, but but you know, I'm gonna need some money to start with I think what's left over should probably go to me in sol What's his name? John Kramer he had

[01:25:31] John Kramer. Yes. He has a protege. Yes. He was hardly paying to protege We don't know that I mean she had she had she had to eat she had to live They travel and saw X there in mexico. I mean that costs money

[01:25:44] Yeah, but what was she doing before and because he was like an architect or something right? So what was she doing? She was a drug addict and that that requires money too How much do you want for drugs then so I'm just saying what's

[01:25:56] I mean in los angeles 2300s, you know, that's a good weekly uh stipend All I'm saying is what's left over. I think right rightly goes to me because I helped you I helped you see it through but you're gonna take on no, I can give you 400 euro

[01:26:12] That's all I'm gonna give you 400 euro. I'm gonna negotiate up. I'm I'm gonna say 550 is about that's my bottom ceiling. I that's my that's my floor I can't go lower than 550

[01:26:23] I have I have rates I have to maintain if people find out that I charge less they're gonna want less for me Then I've less than two. Uh, can I murder you

[01:26:34] That is that is an option. It's a good twist on the end. Although I do have to then get another bin, don't I? Yeah, then you got then you got a whole of the rental situation going on. Yeah And that's more time and then uh um

[01:26:48] If I give you 450 I can do 550 that's what I can do and I've done a lot I've done more far more than what 550 normally gets you if I give you I mean I would charge minimum eight

[01:27:00] Okay, how about this? How about this and I don't know is this an Irish thing or is it just uh, My dad did every time he bought a car where I'll give you fight 50 Okay, and then you give me back 50 for good luck. How about that?

[01:27:14] I can do that at six you go six and I give you 50 back The point of it is that you give me the 50 back for good luck

[01:27:20] So I'm I you know I go off and do good things if if my if my uh tax returns come back that I'm under It's it's bad news 5 20 I I gotta do 550 that's my floor

[01:27:34] No, but I don't want to come under with I have dues to pay at the cult. I have not been keeping up That's not my problem Yeah, but you can come back next year. This is exposure. That's what this is. This is exposure

[01:27:47] I don't do I don't work for exposure anymore. I'm over a certain age. I no longer work for exposure Or copy your credit. I don't do any of that anymore. You got I gotta I gotta get paid my minimum Sorry, man. Hey the wga fought for a reason

[01:28:01] And they won okay, don't bring them into us. I'll give you the fight fucking 50 now get out of my band Very annoyed by that 1,950 Right, uh, I would look up how much how much do you have to pay into Scientology it's just

[01:28:26] Yeah, guarantee you're under surely they'll take what Oh, it's usually 10 percent. Um in addition to courses you must attend auditing essentially the church's terms for therapy Which costs 800 dollars an hour. I mean that doesn't say you know an owl. Yeah Okay, no, what are Scientology dues? uh

[01:28:48] Yeah, I've never seen you this flustered and frustrated Yeah, it's just when I got into the money part. I thought it'd just be a fun thing of like, hey I'm gonna be a horror icon like your your your some of your favorite movies

[01:29:00] What you think and then it became a budget for a short film essentially Kevin has had have you ever had have you had a podcast yet where It really turned on you and you ended up having to make all the decisions

[01:29:15] No, and I think now I've realized why I've strictly always kept it to The guest is the ruler of a country. Um, oh, I love this a few episodes ago Ryan Webb comedian in Chicago

[01:29:29] He brought into his island the idea of an obstacle course that would be I heard that one. I like that one Yes, I think that's where this idea of horror teams would be fun

[01:29:41] And I thought it'd be fun to come up with ideas on how to kill it didn't come into that It became how would you write them or permits and what it became a crash course in indie filmmaking? Yeah, it's not fun. Um

[01:29:54] So there was one point where you just you literally just put your face in your hands like oh my god Yeah, and as I said, I looked at booking.com the blank box said where are you going?

[01:30:09] I decided, uh, I don't know anymore and that was only halfway through it But okay, so qui vinaurine That's that's my should really write just write this as a short someone attempting Now now now you have to write it as a short. Oh, you're cooking. Okay

[01:30:24] I will say I'm gonna do that for a year and never do it ever again And I will I will hand you over the George R. R. Martin mask Welcome to indie filmmaking. It was George R. R. Martin. Yeah, we didn't go with

[01:30:39] Which became irrelevant by that it just became irrelevant. We're too busy with the budget Thank god I wasn't doing lawn dramatic services because I'd have to figure out the cost of them and they'd probably cost loads in LA and um Okay, so fantastic. I love that Patrick besides

[01:30:59] Because at no point did I try to murder you and you were a filmmaker as well. You also do that podcast Your own horror one. Okay, where do I find that? You can find Rewind of the living dead

[01:31:10] Quite literally everywhere you get a podcast youtube included. We're everywhere. Um, we're actually pretty big in ireland truth be told I get uh, I get I get uh feedback once a week on how on where our podcast is trending and ireland almost

[01:31:23] We're almost always in the top 200 of uh, uh podcasts in ireland That's pretty sweet Yeah, I didn't know that who knows why ireland and the philippines and sweden seem to love it

[01:31:34] Did you have you ever reviewed any um like our irish horror movies? I don't know off the top. I have not I not that I know Oh, no, we did um, oh, we did boys from county hell, which is a fantastic movie

[01:31:46] I think either you told me about this movie before I just I did yeah Yeah, have you ever done the leprechaun? It's a great movie. We haven't done it yet We're we're deciding if we want to it's tough. It's tough to pick movies that are that crazy

[01:32:02] I will watch all of them and in command and tell you why they're all absolutely factual How they work Okay, they're enough do you oh actually i'm gonna end this and say thank you to everyone for listening to whatever happened here um

[01:32:18] And yes, I also have to ask if i'm going to usually I don't have an outro But you know how in horror movies. Yeah, maybe because of freddy krueger They come up with quips right there. There's always a line they say, you know

[01:32:30] What's the one with freddy krueger one two he's coming for you or oh one two freddy's coming for you Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah, um, what would creepy norine do? Watching mighting it have to be writing related or bold bold don't be bold. No, that's just

[01:32:47] Don't be bold Although that ties into my creepy long winded talks about sex Don't be bold spend wisely And they say hand you over a check that i'm not happy about okay. Well done everyone. Goodbye peace